Firstly thanks to all the advice - this has been a nightmare 4 me.
Secondly a number of workarouns helped - if only temporary - particulary turning off unnecesry services and startup items (not sure which was the culprit!!)
I think (hope) the problem is now resolved but not sure how!
1. Admin created multiple new chars for me ;D
2. Havin read some other posts I noticed some players have had issue with AVG - particularly after the new update
3. Before playin this mod I had a problem with AVG and had uninstalled it - unfortunately it wasn’t clean and left email scanner and watchdog on my system
4. I then reinstalled AVG and got it working properlly, howvee when trying to reconnect to the server i only giot as far as the server list
5. I uninstalled AVG again - this time clean - I can now connect and have all 5 chars up and running. ;D
6. Played 2nite for 3 hours - no lagg or loss of connection!!!
For the record my OS is Visat 64bit
Thanks again for all the advice and I hope this explanation is of use to others.